The Birth Of The Client/Attendant Relationship

By Vince Pirrottina.

As always communication is the key to any relationship, this starts when a Client and Attendant meet for the very first time. It is natural for both parties to feel a bit uneasy at first especially with someone new to Attendant Care work. It’s important to make them comfortable and discuss any fears they may have. Letting them know there will be someone helping and giving one to one training.

I have always exchanged postal and Email addresses, home phone and mobile numbers with my Attendant carers.

This may be frowned upon by the agency, but I find this also helps to enhance communication, fosters mutual trust and respect. I also make it a personal rule to communicate with Attendant carers for only important exchanges of information. This for me means communicating by mobile or emails unless the attendant carers says it’s OK to ring their home number.

I start by informing the Attendant carers that I am married, have a dog and of my disability and all the equipment I use. I explain that I don’t mind personal questions but reserve the right to answer them.

I find out how they feel about dogs and let them know how I want them to relate to our dog.

I next find it helpful for me to talk with the Attendant carer about what they think the job is about and what their expectations are.

I then inform the attendant what tasks I need doing, how I like them done and that my wife will help me with their training, and the dynamics of our relationship.

I like to explain that in the event that I give an instruction and my wife overrides my instruction. In this case, the Attendant carers are to explain what I said and then follow her lead. Because I may be in another room when I gave the instruction, I might not be aware of what’s happening. In this way the Attendant carer isn’t the meat in the sandwich.

I let them know that I will teach them the best way to do tasks with me, learned and refined with my wife and Attendant carers with many years experience with me. That after learning our techniques I would be happy to listen to any suggestions they might have in the importance of working as a team.

I like to get the attendant to talk about themselves, so I can get a feel of their personality.

Discussing our likes and dislikes, and opening channels of dialog that establish a base for our relationship.

Eg:

• Why they have chosen to be an Attendant Carer,
• Are they a night or day person,
• Do they like or hate doing dishes,
• Do they enjoy gardening,
• A bit about their hobbies or interests.

That is discussing these things together at the interview stage means we can start to relate to each other as individuals.

By the time the Attendant carer leaves I will have given them valuable knowledge about how I view punctuality and privacy issues.

Even after they have learned a task, I will still take them through it so I can keep up my skills of directing my own care.

I will be trying to look after their back with techniques I use, as I feel that they can’t look after me if I don’t look after them.

That we have an understanding of what each of us expects and wants from this working relationship.

With this solid foundation established, I believe the Attendant carer, my Wife and I have a better chance of having a respectful and happy fruitful relationship. With enhanced longevity and the possibility of our relationship evolving into something much more meaningful over time.